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Prayer Journal: Day 256

Day 256

Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of Him who is the head, that is, Christ. – Ephesians 4:15 NIV

Numbers don’t lie. When we look at how many people have died as a result of the COVID-19 pandemic, we can be ever so grateful that vaccines are available. 

Although I did get a fever around 24 hours after my second dose of the COVID-19 Pfizer-BioNTech vaccine, I still feel grateful that God protects me and my health. The Lord knows we are suffering and He comforts us. He gives us hope. A fever means that my immune system is doing exactly what it should be doing. There is no reason to be afraid. 

The Lord reveals to us what is important. Amen. 

Prayer Journal: Day 72

Day 72

Therefore I also, after I heard of your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, do not cease to give thanks for you, making mention of you in my prayers: that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give to you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of Him, the eyes of your understanding being enlightened. – Ephesians 1:15-18

God asks us to pray for one another.

My mom’s good friend tested positive for COVID-19 on 11/10/20. Hopefully his case is mild. 

God blesses us in times of sickness and in health. When we are healthy, we can praise Him. When we are ill, we learn from Him patience and gratitude. He always takes care of us. As we grow in the knowledge of Him we can find peace. Amen. 

Prayer Journal: Day 64

Day 64

Gracious is the Lord, and righteous; Yes, our God is merciful. The Lord preserves the simple; I was brought low, and He saved me. Return to your rest, O my soul, for the Lord has dealt bountifully with you. – Psalm 116:5-7

I know what is like to be brought low. When I tested positive for COVID-19 on September 1st, I was scared. I didn’t imagine that I would be sick months later. I don’t have the energy I used to have. I need to rest more than I did before. After I was released from quarantine 28 days later, I think many people assumed I was fully recovered. Although many of my symptoms significantly improved, and I was no longer contagious, I had fatigue and nausea two months later. Some people say this pandemic is a hoax, but it is not. It is real, and we are all in it together. Immunity has come at a price. 

Christ paid a price for our sins. The Lord knows we need to rest. He knows we are living at a difficult time, but He cares for us, and He will always be there to save us. 

Prayer Journal: Day 51

Day 51

Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time, casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you. – 1 Peter 5: 6-7

After it had been 17 days after I first found out that I tested positive for COVID-19, I began to experience what is called “long haulers” side effects of COVID-19. COVID-19 is a malicious disease that can attack the heart, lungs, and even the brain. 

Global studies revealed that I was not alone in my long haulers symptoms. There are real, long-term symptoms of COVID-19, well after the fever goes away. 

I had experienced a dry cough, shortness of breath, pain in my right rib cage from coughing for three weeks, nausea, loss of appetite, insomnia, headaches, fatigue, anxiety, and severe depression during the third week of my illness. 

A doctor prescribed me a low dose of an antidepressant. I didn’t even realize that I was depressed at first. All I knew was that I didn’t feel like myself. COVID-19 can negatively impact the brain. 

I had spent many years in school cultivating my knowledge. It seemed like a cruel and unusual punishment that COVID-19 had impacted my mental and physical health, and that it hit me so hard. 

It was humbling to admit that I needed an antidepressant for the first time in my life to get back to a healthy balance. 

What does it mean to cast all of our cares upon Jesus? Does it mean that all our problems go away? Certainly not. It does mean that Jesus has gone through far more suffering than we have ever seen. He knows our pain.  He knows how to heal us. He reaches out to us daily and asks us if we want to be healed. We just need to take Him by the hand and accept His gift. 

It is by grace we have been saved. It is not of ourselves. It is the grace of God. God’s grace heals us. We just have to trust Him. Amen. 

Prayer Journal: Day 50

Day 50

Surely He has borne our griefs and carried our sorrow; smitten by God, and afflicted. But He was wounded for our transgressions, He was bruised for our iniquities; the chastisement for our peace was upon Him, and by His stripes we are healed. – Isaiah 53:4-5

I have many sorrows sometimes. 

I had never felt as overwhelmed as I was when I was recovering from COVID-19. After I tested positive for COVID-19 on September 1, 2020, I hadn’t felt like myself. I had been exhausted and angry. I  had lashed out. I had yelled and cried and had meltdowns. It wasn’t normal. 

COVID-19 is a malicious disease, and its long-term effects are not fully understood. Many “long haulers” like me have experienced depression, fatigue, and loss of appetite, well after the fever has gone away. I didn’t fully understand what was happening to me at first, and I was scared. 

But the Lord has given me strength to seek professional help. He lined up many friends, family, therapists, counselors, and doctors to help me. 

My church prayed for me. God knows the beginning and the end. He knows about suffering more than anyone else. He knows how to help me and whom I should ask for help. He won’t give up on me. Amen. 

Prayer Journal: Day 49

Day 49

Have no fear of sudden disaster or of the ruin that overtakes the wicked, for the Lord will keep your foot from being snared. – Proverbs 3:25-26

I have a lot of fear. I am afraid that I’m such a people pleaser that I won’t be able to take care of Jacob sometimes because I am so caught up in pleasing other people that I no longer have anything left to give. 

I felt burnt out, exhausted and overwhelmed after my COVID-19 diagnosis. 

It is a scary feeling to have no energy, not even enough strength to get up. 

It felt like I was powerless when my energy plummeted during the third week of my COVID-19 recovery. 

The Lord did not want me to feel this way. He wants us to walk in light, not in darkness. 

He can calm the storm, any disaster, be it a raging wildfire, a pandemic, or a mental meltdown. 

Our anger is to protect us, to tell us that something is wrong and that something needs to change.

Jesus asks us to choose life. We need to have the confidence to follow His lead when everything seems to be wrong and nothing seems to be right. 

He loves us more than life itself. He wants us to be free.

We just need to accept it. 

Prayer Journal: Day 46, My COVID-19 Story

Day 46

Be still, and know that I am God. – Psalm 46:10

During the last week of August 2020 I caught a cold, and I was not sure if it was COVID-19 so I went to get tested on 8/27/20. I had a fever of 100.2 degrees, a cough, chills, mucus, and aches and pains. I thought it could have been a mild form of COVID-19. I had been afraid of catching coronavirus after the lockdown started in March. I had been also tremendously stressed because my car was totaled on August 7th, even though nobody was hurt and insurance covered most of the costs to replace the vehicle.

God knows that He will not give us more than what we can bear. God is the great physician and can heal us. He knows our lying down and our getting up.

He knows how to help us, and He will deliver us from this illness. All we have to do is be still and know that He is God.

I trust Him. He will take care of all my needs. He will heal me, both physically and mentally. He knows everything and nothing is too hard for God. Amen.

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