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Prayer Journal: Day 54

Day 54

Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the snare, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. – Hebrews 12:1-2

I often feel weighted down by others’ problems, the generational sins, and by my family’s dysfunctions. Every family has its own set of dysfunctions, but God knows this and wants us not to be burdened by sin.

He knows that if we try to carry those burdens by ourselves, we become easily exhausted. 

The race has already been won. Jesus bore the burdens for us. He gives us the strength to carry on when our burdens seem too heavy. We just need to stop and ask Him for help, and He is always there for us, like a good shepherd, guarding and protecting us. He endured the cross for us. It is an incredible gift – grace by faith!

Not everyone understands our truth. Not everyone understands our burdens. Not everyone understands our intent, but God does. He knows our inner thoughts. He knows our minds. He knows our hearts. 

The burdens we receive in life are meant to teach us. Sometimes we don’t want to listen until we fall. But Christ is always there to catch us. All we have to do is reach out for His hand. He is always there to listen to us. He wants to communicate with us. He wants to teach us. He loves us, and we love Him, too. When we truly love the Lord, our lives begin to change. Our thoughts change. Our priorities change. 

Sin of the world is meant to distract us. The devil looks for every opportunity to trip us up. He knows our weaknesses, but we don’t have to give in. When we feel ourselves distracted from God’s purpose, we simply need to ask the Lord to guide us. And He will always be there to lead us back to the way everlasting. Amen.

Prayer Journal: Day 53

Day 53


The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves such as have a contrite spirit. – Psalm 34:18

It pains me when I try to please some of my clients by waiving my rush order policies and they repay me by taking out their frustrations on me via email.

The Lord’s counsel is what stands, and I trust that He will show me whom I should work with and also when I should stop working with someone.

Our energy is finite, so it is important to trust the Lord, and when He tells us to stop doing something for our own good, we need to stop doing it. The Lord is a loving father. He doesn’t want to see us hurting. He bore our burdens for us. We need to surrender our problems to Him and trust that He will find the right solutions for us. The Lord knows what is best for us and loves us. If we follow Him, “all these things will be added” unto us (Matthew 6:33), and He will take care of all our needs. Amen.

Prayer Journal: Day 52

Day 52

And whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not to men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the reward of the inheritance; for you serve the Lord Christ. – Colossians 3: 23-24

Whenever we feel overwhelmed by work, it is good to remember that whatever we do,  we do it for the Lord. The Lord is truly whom we serve, not men. There is really no need to please others, because our ultimate goal is to please God. 

What pleases God? Loving one another, being kind, patient, long suffering, and full of self control. 

It’s scary to lose control of one’s temper. Anger may be there to protect us in some cases, but it is a harmful emotion, and we don’t want to harm those we love by being angry.  

Unrighteous anger only makes us fools. Instead of reaching for anger in our emotional toolkit when things don’t go our way and when we disagree with others, we need to take a deep breath and be patient. 

We need to state our needs nicely, and say “please.”

Nobody likes being yelled at. We get more bees from honey than from vinegar. The Lord wants us to love, not hate.

Prayer Journal: Day 51

Day 51

Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time, casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you. – 1 Peter 5: 6-7

After it had been 17 days after I first found out that I tested positive for COVID-19, I began to experience what is called “long haulers” side effects of COVID-19. COVID-19 is a malicious disease that can attack the heart, lungs, and even the brain. 

Global studies revealed that I was not alone in my long haulers symptoms. There are real, long-term symptoms of COVID-19, well after the fever goes away. 

I had experienced a dry cough, shortness of breath, pain in my right rib cage from coughing for three weeks, nausea, loss of appetite, insomnia, headaches, fatigue, anxiety, and severe depression during the third week of my illness. 

A doctor prescribed me a low dose of an antidepressant. I didn’t even realize that I was depressed at first. All I knew was that I didn’t feel like myself. COVID-19 can negatively impact the brain. 

I had spent many years in school cultivating my knowledge. It seemed like a cruel and unusual punishment that COVID-19 had impacted my mental and physical health, and that it hit me so hard. 

It was humbling to admit that I needed an antidepressant for the first time in my life to get back to a healthy balance. 

What does it mean to cast all of our cares upon Jesus? Does it mean that all our problems go away? Certainly not. It does mean that Jesus has gone through far more suffering than we have ever seen. He knows our pain.  He knows how to heal us. He reaches out to us daily and asks us if we want to be healed. We just need to take Him by the hand and accept His gift. 

It is by grace we have been saved. It is not of ourselves. It is the grace of God. God’s grace heals us. We just have to trust Him. Amen. 

Prayer Journal: Day 50

Day 50

Surely He has borne our griefs and carried our sorrow; smitten by God, and afflicted. But He was wounded for our transgressions, He was bruised for our iniquities; the chastisement for our peace was upon Him, and by His stripes we are healed. – Isaiah 53:4-5

I have many sorrows sometimes. 

I had never felt as overwhelmed as I was when I was recovering from COVID-19. After I tested positive for COVID-19 on September 1, 2020, I hadn’t felt like myself. I had been exhausted and angry. I  had lashed out. I had yelled and cried and had meltdowns. It wasn’t normal. 

COVID-19 is a malicious disease, and its long-term effects are not fully understood. Many “long haulers” like me have experienced depression, fatigue, and loss of appetite, well after the fever has gone away. I didn’t fully understand what was happening to me at first, and I was scared. 

But the Lord has given me strength to seek professional help. He lined up many friends, family, therapists, counselors, and doctors to help me. 

My church prayed for me. God knows the beginning and the end. He knows about suffering more than anyone else. He knows how to help me and whom I should ask for help. He won’t give up on me. Amen. 

Prayer Journal: Day 49

Day 49

Have no fear of sudden disaster or of the ruin that overtakes the wicked, for the Lord will keep your foot from being snared. – Proverbs 3:25-26

I have a lot of fear. I am afraid that I’m such a people pleaser that I won’t be able to take care of Jacob sometimes because I am so caught up in pleasing other people that I no longer have anything left to give. 

I felt burnt out, exhausted and overwhelmed after my COVID-19 diagnosis. 

It is a scary feeling to have no energy, not even enough strength to get up. 

It felt like I was powerless when my energy plummeted during the third week of my COVID-19 recovery. 

The Lord did not want me to feel this way. He wants us to walk in light, not in darkness. 

He can calm the storm, any disaster, be it a raging wildfire, a pandemic, or a mental meltdown. 

Our anger is to protect us, to tell us that something is wrong and that something needs to change.

Jesus asks us to choose life. We need to have the confidence to follow His lead when everything seems to be wrong and nothing seems to be right. 

He loves us more than life itself. He wants us to be free.

We just need to accept it. 

Prayer Journal: Day 48: My Mom’s COVID-19 Test Came Back Negative

Day 48

I sought the Lord, and he heard me, and delivered me from all my fears. – Psalm 34:4

God is good! My mom’s COVID-19 test came back negative on September 6, 2020! I felt so relieved. My husband and I had eaten dinner with her in person at Red Lobster in Reno on the night of August 25th, the day we picked up my new car. I wore my mask during dinner because I had eaten a late lunch beforehand. God protected my mom from getting the virus! Hallelujah! This was the best news that I had gotten in several months.

God delivered me from my greatest fear – that my mom would have caught COVID-19 from me during our time together. She is 78 years old and is high risk for COVID-19, but God heard our prayers and delivered her from any harm.

Prayer Journal: Day 47, Finding Out That I Tested Positive for COVID-19 on September 1st

Day 47

“In an acceptable time I have heard you, and I have helped you.” Behold, now is the accepted time; behold, now is the day of salvation. – 2 Corinthians 6:2

I found out on September 1, 2020 that my COVID-19 test came back positive. I had to quarantine for at least 14 days. None of my family and friends whom I had come in contact with during the prior two weeks were sick. 

The Lord is good. I know that He is taking care of me. He is the great physician, and He will heal me completely. And when I recover I might donate plasma so that I can help others who have COVID-19 to recover. 

The Lord is good and abounding in mercy. He gave me time of solitude and peace to turn my eyes upon Him. His mercy endures forever, and I love Him. Amen. 

Prayer Journal: Day 46, My COVID-19 Story

Day 46

Be still, and know that I am God. – Psalm 46:10

During the last week of August 2020 I caught a cold, and I was not sure if it was COVID-19 so I went to get tested on 8/27/20. I had a fever of 100.2 degrees, a cough, chills, mucus, and aches and pains. I thought it could have been a mild form of COVID-19. I had been afraid of catching coronavirus after the lockdown started in March. I had been also tremendously stressed because my car was totaled on August 7th, even though nobody was hurt and insurance covered most of the costs to replace the vehicle.

God knows that He will not give us more than what we can bear. God is the great physician and can heal us. He knows our lying down and our getting up.

He knows how to help us, and He will deliver us from this illness. All we have to do is be still and know that He is God.

I trust Him. He will take care of all my needs. He will heal me, both physically and mentally. He knows everything and nothing is too hard for God. Amen.

Prayer Journal: Day 45

Day 45

For this is God, our God forever and ever; He will be our guide even to death. – Psalm 48:14

I always ask God to guide me, yet I don’t always let Him because I am so consumed by my worries, negative thoughts, and family drama.

Life won’t always be this hard.

When God guides us, that doesn’t mean that our problems go away. It means that He has a purpose for us, and sometimes listening to Him and following His will is not the easiest thing to do.

It is so easy to be stuck in unforgiveness, anger, and resentment. But God never changes. And He wants the best for us and the best for those we love.

He transcends space and time. He knows what we are going through and how it will end. He can also give us a happy ending if we trust Him.

Everything will be okay.

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